Tokyo keepers catch fugitive penguin

The Japanese nation breathes a sigh of relief as the fugitive penguin that escaped a Tokyo zoo has been caught after two months causing havoc in the city. Thanks to my bro for spotting this hugely significant story that I hadn't even heard about, despite living in Tokyo.

Virtual hostesses - why go out when you can stay in?

While innocently searching the web for work-related information about mobile gaming platforms, I came across this: virtual hostess clubs. If paying women to just sit and talk to you wasn't odd enough, you can also do it from the comfort of your mobile phone. Very odd.

I was so hungry, I ate a horse

The other day I went to one of my favourite bars and noticed that they had horse meat sashimi on the menu. I had to try it.

The meat was really good quality and had a richer flavour than beef, but not as rich as venison.

Despite this, I couldn't get the thought out of my head that it was wrong to eat horse as they are pets. And I kept getting visions of the horse being slaughtered (this has never happened to me before when eating any other meat).

I also wouldn't recommend the spleen (the paler piece on the left of the dish). That bit was truly gross.

Smuggling peanuts

A Japanese company has unveiled a new bra. No big deal you say? Well, let me tell you it has built-in ice packs, a wind chime and sprig of mint to help keep women cool this summer. I have no idea how the final two things help, but according to the manufacturer, it's 'by way of its refreshing fragrance and sound.'

Ladies, I'll let you be the judge.

Hello Kitty has landed, but not in Japan

A friend from New Zealand shared this with me: a Taiwanese airline is now offering Hello Kitty themed flights. I can't believe this isn't available in Japan yet!

Japan's first 'cleavage cafe'

In no way is this sexist or demeaning. Women looking like 'sexy secretaries' shine your shoes for the small entrance fee of 400 yen (about 3 pounds/ six NZ dollars) and will happily discuss manga, anime or anything else you want to talk about.

Oh, and they definitely won't be wearing this fashionable little number.

You said what?

It has only recently occurred to me how many odd phrases there are in English compared to other languages. 

Idioms such as 'it costs an arm and a leg', 'out of the blue' and 'you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours' have left my Japanese friends and colleagues looking at me like I was speaking another lang...

Anyway, in addition to the common foreigner tactic of talking really slowly and over-emphasising every third or fourth syllable, I've also taken to trying to use the simplest word at all times. Needless to say, this is very tiring and has also caused a couple of people to ask if I had some sort of speech impediment.

When I tell them I don't, they ask me to talk at my normal speed. Unfortunately, I am seemingly unable to do this as I'm so practised in speaking at pedestrian pace.